This is a fiction story, but it happens all the time. Many of our military wives have to face the valley of the shadow of death in the worst state imaginable – alone.
Wincing as another wave of pain washed over her, Jamie tried vainly to focus on the clock on the wall of her labor room. The soft, rhythmic splush-splush sound that indicated the baby’s heartbeat seemed to get louder and just a bit faster as the contraction peaked, and then slowed a bit again as the contraction monitor indicator went back down. Jamie sighed and shook her head, hoping it would clear her sluggish brain. She reached for some ice chips to cool her parched lips, letting her mind drift to the last day she had seen her husband, the day he left for Iraq.
She remembered watching him stride off into the plane in his army uniform, his pack slung over his shoulder. Just before reaching the door, he turned, locked her eyes with his, smiled his lopsided grin and waved. Was it really only a month ago? She wondered. They were both so looking forward to this baby, their first, and now he was overseas. That one month seemed to last forever.
Her reverie was broken by another contraction, this one even more brutal than the last. Her breath came in sharp gasps, though she tried valiantly to control it, and the pain was almost unbearable. She heard someone enter the room, a nurse maybe, and check the instruments. “You’re doing real well,” the nurse told Jamie when the contraction was over. Jamie smiled weakly and mumbled her thanks. She was just about to try to tell the nurse how the Lord has been giving her strength, when she was interrupted by another contraction.
Through this whole month she had felt so very alone, and yet she knew God was with her, strengthening her. She had been dreading going through labor and delivery by herself, but she simply didn’t know anyone well enough in this area yet to invite them to the labor room with her, having only moved to Fort Benning three months ago. And so, when her husband got deployed to Iraq, she knew she was facing a lonely delivery. But even though her faith was strong, she was totally unprepared for the valley she was about to enter.
The nurse had checked her and discovered that the baby was breach, and that the cord was prolapsed, or coming out first. This made a normal delivery impossible, since the oxygen supply to the baby would be cut off during the whole pushing phase. Jamie was still trying to make sense of the words the nurse said before running out the door, “emergency cesarean!” As the next wave of pain struck her, Jamie felt so terribly alone – and afraid. Through the pain, she wondered if the Lord was still in control. Her heart poured forth her burdens in prayer. Oh God, please give me the strength to have this baby, and may it be healthy. You are the only one who can help me!
Within seconds, the room erupted in a whirl of activity. Most of it Jamie couldn’t understand through the pain, but she heard the nurse tell her to breathe through the oxygen mask and did what she was told. “It’s for the baby,” the nurse explained quickly. One nurse was trying to remove her earrings, but another nurse stopped her. “There just isn’t time!” she hissed. Into the IV they put some pain killer, and Jamie was borne away to a noisy place where nothing seemed to matter.
So tired, Jamie thought. And I hurt from head to toe! Though her eyes were closed, she could hear that two people had entered the room. “She’s starting to come around,” one kind voice said.
“Mrs. Martin, you’ve had a baby girl,” said the other. The mush in Jamie’s mind began to clear. Baby? Oh, yes, that’s right! I was in the hospital in labor! Her eyes fluttered open and she asked, “Where is she? Is she alright?” There was a brief pause before the nurse answered.
“She’s being tested right now, but the doctors think she’ll be fine,” the kind nurse replied.
“Tested?! What happened?? Ouch!” Jamie tried to move, but was instantly stopped by a sharp pain in her abdomen.
“The doctor will come in soon to tell you all about it,” the nurse replied. “Meanwhile, you try to get some rest. You’ve been through a lot.” Then both nurses filed out the door, leaving Jamie to figure out what was going on through her muddled brain.
Lord, what happened? Why did this happen to me? Is the baby going to be ok? Hot tears squeezed slid down her cheeks as she tried to sort things out.
Not only did she have to go through labor and delivery alone, but she had to have an emergency cesarean, and now she didn’t even have her baby with her! She felt like she hadn’t even had a baby.
Suddenly it seemed as though the presence of God filled the little recovery room. There, amongst the blinking lights, the whirring machines, and the impersonal monitors, her gracious Lord poured His love into her spirit. His still, small voice spoke peace to her heart, as plainly as if someone had laid a nice warm blanket over her aching, weary body. A Scripture verse ran through her numbed mind. “When thou passest through the waters, I will be with thee; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow thee: when thou walkest through the fire, thou shalt not be burned; neither shall the flame kindle upon thee. For I am the LORD thy God, the Holy One of Israel, thy Saviour” (Isaiah 43:2) She sighed and snuggled deeper into her blankets, contented in the realization that, though she was alone, she was not alone. Her Lord was with her, and would help her through.
Moments later, she settled into a deep, restful sleep, knowing that the Lord was truly in control, and she was not alone.
…to be continued next week, Lord Willing!
